thinking too much - it's a disease

we're all going somewhere. this is most prominent early in the morning. at around 5am. wherein the hustle and bustle is very evident. everyone has a place to go to. To accomplish or to attain a certain level of satisfaction for the day. so so short term. will all our daily travels be cumulative to our end goal in life? Me, i just came from a drinking session with friends. my day had come to an end. and all these people were starting theirs. i look at their faces, wondering if they really knew where they were going or if they really know what they want in their lives. I knew where i was going. Home. My hustle and bustle started 12 hrs ago. And I'm finally coming home. It's the best feeling in the world. These are the times that I feel most alive.

to retreat is not to surrender

back to normal programming ... just came from a three day retreat and everything went swell. i learned a lot and everything seemed enlightening while i was still in the retreat house. but when i got back, it seems that what i have learned would not be enough. it takes a lot to be different. and to be good. Fr Jong never mentioned anything about doing a,b,c when it comes to, say, problem Y. To be in the middle of the world. That is the challenge. To sanctify one's own work and offer it up to God. struggling. coping. I want to be an instrument of your peace. i hope i don't drown in all the wordliness that the world has to offer -- forgive the pun - couldn't help it :)